It’s awesome that God is showing me how to let Him love me. The bible has been “boring” to me for a while now. I’m still a Christian but I haven’t found pleasure in reading His words (the word He inspired the authors to write).
As a way of developing our family culture, Wes and I are making sure to do some things differently (and some things the same) as our parents did when we were growing up. One of the things we make sure to do as often as possible is that we eat meals at the table. I (usually) make sure that dinner is ready whenever Wes gets home (or that it’s almost ready- lol) and, when he gets home, we sit down together and eat. After we eat, we read a chapter of the bible.
I’m not gonna lie: at first, I was TOTALLY put off by the fact that he wanted to read the freaking bible at dinner- like major eye rolls and EVERYTHING! But, I came to realize that I do like it. Strange, right?! (Not really.) Laila Grace loves it, though. When she’s finished eating, she says “bible? Book?” Until either Wes or I read. And then she says, “bed?” Because we usually put her to bed after we read.
And the Bible has become more interesting! During baby’s first year of life, it was hard for me to concentrate on reading (so sad. So very, very sad) so I read her kiddie bible because it was on my level and I could understand it… the short length helped, as well as the little synopsis at the end of each little story. At counseling, my therapist gave me a scripture:
The Lord your God is in the midst of you, a Mighty One, a Savior [Who saves]! He will rejoice over you with joy; He will rest [in silent satisfaction] and in His love He will be silent and make no mention [of past sins, or even recall them]; He will exult over you with singing. – Zephaniah 3:17 AMP
She told me to read it and meditate on it. I read it aloud as I sat with her. And, as I read it, I got choked up and I realized that this was about ME! It’s like something just clicked. This is how God feels about me!!!
But I’m writing this because I’m at church and the pastor read a verse and it literally came alive. And when I pictured what was happening, I remembered that this (finding the bible interesting) is new to me. It’s something that I haven’t experienced in a while. Probably since I first became a Christian when I was in middle school. So, when the verse came alive, I actually remembered to thank God for reminding me of this way that He’s teaching me how to let Him love me. This is a “small” thing but, for me, the small things are bigger than the big things. They seem more meaningful- those details. So I value them more right now. The little reminders.
I went to a memorial service for someone who is very important to Wes’ side of the family. And the pastor said something very interesting. He said” Isn’t it good that we can’t earn our salvation? If we did/could, heaven wouldn’t be nearly as cool. People would be boasting about all of the things that they did to earn their spot in heaven when heaven is supposed to be about us praising God. All day and all night. Just praising Him.” And that concept is something that I never thought about. I never really considered that angle as to why God made His kingdom the way that He did. But that pastor’s explanation totally made sense to me. I was so excited that I came home and told Wes about it.
Yesterday, when I read Matthew 12, I literally lol’d when I got to verses 25-27. Jesus is talking to the Pharisees because they were totally offended that Jesus was healing people on the Sabbath. In case you don’t understand why Jesus healing on the Sabbath was such a big deal to the Pharisees (who were so, so into keeping the law), the Sabbath was supposed to be a day of rest. No working. No cooking. And, especially, no healing. But, the thing is that the law that the Pharisees so zealously followed was written as a way for people to be able to be close to God before Jesus came and died for man’s sins. But, this is Jesus that they’re scoffing at! He said, “For the Son of Man is Lord [even] of the Sabbath” (Matthew 12:8). That was just the beginning of the Pharisees getting “owned” by Jesus.
“And knowing their thoughts, He said to them, Any kingdom that is divided against itself is being brought to desolation and laid waste, and no city or house divided against itself will last or continue to stand. And if Satan drives out Satan, he has become divided against himself and disunited; how then will his kingdom last or continue to stand? And if I drive out the demons by [help of] Beelzebub, by whose [help] do your sons drive them out? For this reason they shall be your judges.”
Now, I’m no bible expert butttttttttt it seems to me that he’s calling the Pharisees out saying that they are being used by Satan. Like, if you think I’m being used by the devil and you’re not united with me then by whom do you do your works??? It seems like some higher level reasoning tactics that He’s using that may or may not have gone over the Pharisees’ heads…
But, when we were reading this section, I could imagine the crowds like, “ooooooh dang! Jesus is letting them HAVE IT!” Like He’s a straight up thug (no offense) and He gives it to the Pharisees straight. He calls them out on their mess. And it’s freaking awesome! (Maybe that’s just me who thinks this???)
So, I just wanted to pop in and memorialize the cool thing that God is doing in my life. He’s reviving my interest in His word. He’s making it less “boring” and more “interesting and alive.” And I think that this is freaking “wicked cool” (as my husband would say).